A Chance Encounter

When I was working, I would go to technology conferences and expos in the D.C. area occasionally. It gave me a chance to get out of the office for a day and also, hopefully, pick up a little insight into new ideas, technologies and gadgets which could help me be more productive at my job. And, even if I didn't pick up anything, I still got a day out of the office.

I would usually go alone because I found that I could clear my head and re-order my priorities more efficiently while perusing the new innovations and also day dreaming about current work issues. It just seemed to be an environment that pushed me into a creative and problem solving mode.

However, this isn't a story about how to be effective at one's job. This is a story about what happened one time outside the expo...an event that unfortunately and unduly influenced my outlook on life and my perception of what is right and wrong.

The area where the expo is located is urban but not rundown in any manner. It's in a good part of D.C.. Most of the buildings in the area are modern and relatively new. It seemed to be an ultra safe area in which to walk around and to enjoy as one made his way to the expo center.

However, there did seem to be an ominous and heavy darkness that perched just beyond the perception of the senses. A ghetto-like cityscape surrounded the area. And, one had no choice but to drive through the bad part of town to get to the expo. So, even though the expo area seemed benevolent and benign, the surrounding environment was somewhat shoddy and unwelcoming to strangers of any ilk.

So, on this particular day that I ventured into this area, I found myself walking down a deserted street a few blocks from the expo. The area seemed welcoming. I felt completely safe. I casually noticed a figure walking toward me, on the same side of the street. At first, I couldn't make out any details about the person other than the fact that he seemed somewhat portly.

As we converged on each other, I determined that he was a young black man in his mid-twenties. He was dressed in a suit and wore thick glasses which tended to give him a scholarly air.

I should say that I had run into problems interacting with the local populace on several occasions during my trips to the expo. I had occasionally been accosted verbally and also physically threatened, but never physically attacked in any manner. And, regrettably, I sometimes fell victim to these taunts and gave back as much as I received. But, I usually took those actions to be a natural symptom of and reaction to metropolitan city life and accepted the fact that one needs to be thick skinned in order to survive in that environment. However, I still had some trepidation that I might eventually meet someone bigger and stronger than me who would manifest those aggressive tendencies in the form of a real and meaningful confrontation.

On this particular day, as the stranger and I came closer and closer to each other, I felt completely at ease and even decided to greet the gentleman as we passed. However, when we were a couple of yards apart, he motioned for me to stop. His body language led me to believe that he wanted to engage me in some sort of casual and friendly conversation. I voluntarily stopped and was ready to begin a inane dialogue when all of a sudden he blurted out, "Can you spare a quarter?"

I was taken aback by his question. I certainly wasn't expecting that! I thought that he was going to ask me for the time or directions to the expo center. I thought for a second about his question but couldn't quickly come up with a reason for his inquiry.

I was so surprised that I just reacted instinctively, reached into my pockets, found a quarter and then handed it to him.

He thanked me in a monotonic retort and then walked on. I also continued walking down toward the expo center. But, I must admit that I was flummoxed by this encounter. Why had a person dressed sharply as a businessman and with a seemingly benign deportment ask me for a quarter? It didn't make sense. Was he conducting a psychological or sociological experiment to determine how I would react to his request? Was he reading my body language and concluding that I felt uneasy and would be willing to give him cash to leave me alone?

And, why did I react the way I did? Usually, when confronted by vagrants, I would berate the person and tell him to leave hard working people alone. This day, even though I didn't perceive this gentleman as a threat to my safety, I felt compelled to comply with his wishes.

I still don't know what to make of this few second encounter. But, I do know that it influences my thinking to this day. I still feel a general and nagging unease about his behavior and my reaction to it.

I wish that there were a moral to this story or an easy explanation for our behavior. But, I cannot discern a rational explanation, other than the notion that past prejudices and negative encounters sometimes unduly influence current behavioral constructs.

We both could have done better.